Dream come true: Crystal set to play for Yankees Thursday
TAMPA — Billy Crystal will get to "look mahvelous" in pinstripes. The actor will sign a one-day, minor league contract with the New York Yankees and play in Thursday's exhibition game against the Pittsburgh Pirates.
Crystal, an avid Yankees fan, will work out with the team on Wednesday and will wear uniform No. 60 for the game — to be played one day before his 60th birthday. The Yankees said Monday they have the approval of baseball commissioner Bud Selig.
"I've been waiting 50 years for this call," Crystal said in a statement released by the team. "I'm overwhelmed by the generosity of the Yankees and commissioner Selig. I know this'll be tougher than the Broadway Softball League, but I'm looking forward to helping the younger players, which by the way is all of them. Oops, I have to go, Scott Boras is on the phone."
Crystal, according to the Yankees hit .348 and was captain during his senior year at Long Beach High School in New York. He directed and produced "61*," a move about Roger Maris, Mickey Mantle and the 1961 Yankees.
"The Yankees are excited to welcome the newest member of our team known for his humor and wit as well as his undying love for the Yankees," chief operating officer Lonn Trost said.
Yankees manager Joe Girardi, after Monday night's 4-0 win over Cincinnati, said he hasn't determined what position Crystal will play.
"That remains to be seen," Girardi said. "Obviously, it's kind of exciting. Billy Crystal has done a lot for this organization. He's always been a big part of it. Our way of rewarding him, saying thanks for everything that you've done."
Country singer Garth Brooks has played in spring training games, helping raise money for his Touch 'em All Foundation. He was 1-for-22 (.045) in 1999 with the San Diego Padres, 0-for-17 the following year with the New York Mets and 1-for-8 (.125) in 2004 with the Kansas City Royals.
I've got to admire a guy who loves baseball this much....and he's hilarious to boot.
Tuesday, March 11, 2008
Friday, March 7, 2008
Tidbits: Demi grateful for relationship with Bruce - Tabloid Tidbits- msnbc.com
Tidbits: Demi grateful for relationship with Bruce - Tabloid Tidbits- msnbc.com
Family outings with the current husband and the ex-husband may not be the norm for most people, but Demi Moore couldn’t be happier to have both Ashton Kutcher and Bruce Willis in her life. In an interview with Harper’s Bazaar, Demi explained the motivation behind their unconventional lifestyle.
This is what happens when all parties can be grown-up about it. Thank goodness my parents could.
Family outings with the current husband and the ex-husband may not be the norm for most people, but Demi Moore couldn’t be happier to have both Ashton Kutcher and Bruce Willis in her life. In an interview with Harper’s Bazaar, Demi explained the motivation behind their unconventional lifestyle.
“I’m the product of divorced parents, and my brother and I were the pawns in my parents’ game,” the 45-year-old actress said. “I never wanted that for my kids. At that time, I could not have seen what a gift that situation was, but without that experience, I would not have known there was a different choice to make in my own divorce.”
Still, Demi didn’t foresee what the future held after her divorce from Bruce in 2000. “You know, I didn’t get married and have children so I could get a divorce, get remarried and get along with my ex-husband. But since that is what happened, I am grateful it turned out this way.”
For his part, Ashton appreciates the relationship he and Demi have with Bruce, too, but he told Bazaar it was touch and go at first. “I just had to get over my ego, which was screaming, ‘This guy used to sleep with your woman,’ and I listened instead to the little voice inside that was whispering, ‘This guy loves and cares about your woman.’ Once I did that, it was a cakewalk.”This is what happens when all parties can be grown-up about it. Thank goodness my parents could.
Tech Support Gets a Reprieve While Users Take a Hit - New York Times
Tech Support Gets a Reprieve While Users Take a Hit - New York Times
Funny Tech Support Calls
Caller: So, I'm having a problem with my mouse? It's, like, squeaking?
Agent: I'm sorry, did you say squeaking?
Caller: That's right. The faster I move it across the screen, the louder it squeaks.
Agent: I'm sorry—are you pressing your mouse up against the screen?
Caller: Well, sure! There's a message that says, "Click here to continue!"
----
Caller: Hey, can you help me? My computer has locked up, and no matter how many times I type eleven, it won't unfreeze.
Agent: What do you mean, "type eleven?"
Caller: The message on my screen says, "Error Type 11!"
---
On one call, the caller seemed to be taking an inordinately long time to complete each instruction she was given.
Agent: Ma'am, I can't help noticing that every time I give you an instruction, it takes a really long time before you get back to me. Is your computer that slow?
Caller: Oh, no, it's just the stupid, stupid design of this computer. Every time I want to click something, I have to unplug the keyboard to plug in the mouse. And then every time I want to use the keyboard again, I have to unplug the mouse. Because there's only one jack.
Agent: Ma'am, you do realize that there's a jack on the keyboard itself? You're supposed to plug the mouse into the keyboard, and the keyboard into the computer.
Caller: Are YOU KIDDING ME!? Oh, wait a minute—yes, I see it now! Oh, holy cow. That's going to be so much easier!
Agent: Just out of curiosity, how long have you been using your computer that way?
Caller: Six weeks!
---
A Canadian customer was calling to find out if there was a faster way to trigger menu commands than mousing up to the menus.
Agent: Certainly, sir. There are keyboard shortcuts for many of those commands. For example, suppose you want to trigger the Select All command…
Caller: Yes, I use that one all the time! How do I do it?
Agent: Well, you just press Control-A.
Caller (after a pause): Well, that's not working for me.
Agent: Do you have a text document open in front of you?
Caller: Yes, I sure do.
Agent: OK, now press Control-A.
Caller: I am, but nothing happens.
Agent: The text isn't highlighted?
Caller: No, there's no change at all.
Agent: That's odd. If you press Control-A, the whole document should be highlighted. Try it again. Press Control-A. Tell me exactly what's happening.
Caller (nearing his Canadian breaking point): Listen. I'm pressing Control, eh? And nothing's happening, eh?
Funny Tech Support Calls
Caller: So, I'm having a problem with my mouse? It's, like, squeaking?
Agent: I'm sorry, did you say squeaking?
Caller: That's right. The faster I move it across the screen, the louder it squeaks.
Agent: I'm sorry—are you pressing your mouse up against the screen?
Caller: Well, sure! There's a message that says, "Click here to continue!"
----
Caller: Hey, can you help me? My computer has locked up, and no matter how many times I type eleven, it won't unfreeze.
Agent: What do you mean, "type eleven?"
Caller: The message on my screen says, "Error Type 11!"
---
On one call, the caller seemed to be taking an inordinately long time to complete each instruction she was given.
Agent: Ma'am, I can't help noticing that every time I give you an instruction, it takes a really long time before you get back to me. Is your computer that slow?
Caller: Oh, no, it's just the stupid, stupid design of this computer. Every time I want to click something, I have to unplug the keyboard to plug in the mouse. And then every time I want to use the keyboard again, I have to unplug the mouse. Because there's only one jack.
Agent: Ma'am, you do realize that there's a jack on the keyboard itself? You're supposed to plug the mouse into the keyboard, and the keyboard into the computer.
Caller: Are YOU KIDDING ME!? Oh, wait a minute—yes, I see it now! Oh, holy cow. That's going to be so much easier!
Agent: Just out of curiosity, how long have you been using your computer that way?
Caller: Six weeks!
---
A Canadian customer was calling to find out if there was a faster way to trigger menu commands than mousing up to the menus.
Agent: Certainly, sir. There are keyboard shortcuts for many of those commands. For example, suppose you want to trigger the Select All command…
Caller: Yes, I use that one all the time! How do I do it?
Agent: Well, you just press Control-A.
Caller (after a pause): Well, that's not working for me.
Agent: Do you have a text document open in front of you?
Caller: Yes, I sure do.
Agent: OK, now press Control-A.
Caller: I am, but nothing happens.
Agent: The text isn't highlighted?
Caller: No, there's no change at all.
Agent: That's odd. If you press Control-A, the whole document should be highlighted. Try it again. Press Control-A. Tell me exactly what's happening.
Caller (nearing his Canadian breaking point): Listen. I'm pressing Control, eh? And nothing's happening, eh?
Thursday, March 6, 2008
Wednesday, February 27, 2008
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